Texts from Last Night
by NoCleverSig
Summary: Will Zimmerman gets an unusual text message from Helen Magnus in the middle of the night and discovers a side of her he's NEVER seen!


**Disclaimer: **I own nothing of Sanctuary or its characters. I just play with them.  
**Author's Note: **I was challenged to write a _"funny, drunk Magnus" _fic by a certain someone (Marzia!). You know what? Writing drunk Magnus is harder than you would think, primarily because she's so in control, it's hard to picture her getting into that situation. But alas…here we go. So forgive me if some of this comes across as out of character. As Will would say "Just go with it" ;) As always, thanks to MajorSam for her fabulous beta abilities and song suggestion. (PS: Lyrics are from "Table Dancer" by Keshia Chante)  
**Warning: **Alcohol and drug use references ahoy!

**Texts from Last Night  
**(Copyright 2010, NoCleverSig)

Will Zimmerman turned to the buzzing going off by his bedside, swatting his hand haphazardly at the alarm in the dark. Somehow it didn't feel like 7 a.m. already.

He glanced at the clock, bleary eyed. It was 2:15 a.m. What the hell?

He looked at his night stand and saw his cell phone vibrating wildly across the glass table top. Someone was texting him. He picked it up and slipped on his glasses to see who would have the audacity to call him so frakk'n late.

"_Hi WiL! Can u cum pik me p? I need a ridge pls. I'm at 3305 Half Mon alne. Thanks protégé boy :)_

_Maggy_

Maggy? He didn't know any Maggy…

Wait a minute. Magnus? And she sounded…

Nah. She couldn't be. That wasn't her style. She was the most controlled, reserved person he knew. She never drank to excess. At least, he'd never seen her. But still, the woman was a grammar Nazis even when it came to text messages and this…

This was like one of those lines you'd read on that web site**_ "textsfromlastnight__."_ **And with a smiley.

A smiley! Shit.

Will thought back to what had happened, where she was going yesterday evening. She'd been invited to a private dinner party with some of her closest friends in the local scientific community. Nothing unusual about that. She did that from time to time, just a straight up business affair. She said she'd be back by midnight.

It was 2:15 a.m. What the hell?

Maybe she was sick or drugged? Will jumped out of bed, panicked now, slipped on a pair of jeans and some tennis shoes, pulled on a t shirt, grabbed a jacket, his wallet and keys, and flew out the door as fast as possible.

Fifteen minutes later he pulled up to 3305 Half Moon Lane. It was a chic townhouse in the middle of New City in the heart of the up and coming warehouse district. Trendy clubs, shopping, bars. This part of the city rarely slept.

He found a space, parked his car, and walked up to the bright red door of the town home and knocked. He could hear laughter inside, the bustling of movement. Finally, a burly man in a tweed coat with a goatee and glasses opened the door.

"May I help you?" the man said in a condescending tone.

"I'm Dr. Will Zimmerman. I'm here for Helen Magnus?"

The chubby man's face lit up. "Ah, Helen! Taking her away from us so soon. You naughty boy." He turned around and called out behind him to a group of men standing and sitting in what looked like a living room area. "Helen, sweetheart, your _ride _is here!" The burly man looked Will up and down with an appraising eye when he'd said, _"ride"_ and chuckled.

"Tell him to come in," he heard Magnus say in the distance.

"Come in, my boy, come in."

Will stepped into the foyer and looked around. The home was a mishmash of books, antiques, and antiquities. Definitely professorial. Magnus sat in the middle of a bright red couch surrounded by two equally looking academic types, both of whom sat disturbingly close to her, one with his arm around the back of the couch, lightly playing with her dark, wavy hair. In a wing chair across from the three of them was a fourth man, tall, lanky and haughty looking. They all looked up at Will as he came in, eyeing him suspiciously. Magnus just smiled, a full on, beaming smile.

"Will! Will! Will!" she repeated in rapid succession, reaching her hand out to him. "Come here! I'd like you to meet some of my colleagues." He moved to sit down in a vacant wing chair beside them.

"Dr. Will Zimmerman," she said, her face slightly flush, "This is Dr. Edmund Chartoff, Dr. Geoffrey Bonavilla, Dr. Nikolai Chartosky, and finally," she smiled flirtatiously at the dark haired man with the bushy beard and curly hair sitting closest to her with his arm wrapped behind her still fiddling with her hair, "Dr. Antonio Barretta."

Will nodded. "Pleased to meet you." Although he really wasn't.

They nodded back. Will took a hasty look around. On the coffee table in front of Magnus were shot glasses, a number of them, surrounded by crystal decanters of various colored liquids.

There had definitely been a party going on here…or something. Will felt strangely out of place. He looked back at Magnus and saw her grinning. She never smiled this much. Ever. She was dressed in one of the hottest outfits he'd ever seen her wear. A short, VERY short, tight black dress that was sleeveless on one side revealing more than a little too much skin for his taste and spiky, strappy black heels. Why she would wear such an ensemble to a simple dinner party was beyond him. Dr. Antonio had moved from fingering her hair to caressing her bare shoulder. His other hand was slowly tracing the length of her stocking from her knee, to her thigh, approaching the hem of her dress….

_That was it. Time to go!_ Will thought

"Okay, Magnus. We have to leave now."

She looked up at Will a little blurry eyed and pouted. He'd never seen Magnus pout. Dr. Baretta mumbled something in Italian in her ear, and she put her hand to her mouth and giggled.

Will reached out and grabbed a hold of his boss, pulling her up with two hands from the couch. Before she could even protest, he yanked her out of the room and into the foyer.

"Did you bring a purse? A coat?" Will asked as they headed toward the door.

She looked at him puzzled for a moment. 'Yes!" she remembered suddenly, her eyes wide. "Geoffrey? Can you find my purse, love, and my wrap," she asked sweetly, slightly slurring her words together.

The burly man who had opened the door to Will walked up with both in hand, handing the purse to Will and gently placing the wrap around Helen's shoulders and kissing her on the neck. She closed her eyes and smiled, leaning back into him. Will narrowed his eyes at the man.

"Lovely as always to see you my dear. And congratulations on your victory tonight."

"Thank you, Geoffrey," she purred, turning around and kissing him on the cheek. "Goodnight everyone!" she said loudly, waving to the men in the sitting room. Antonio looked forlorn.

She started to walk out the door and slipped a bit on the rug in her heels. Magnus never slipped in her heels. "Whoopsie!" she giggled in her high British accent. "My bad."

There was no doubt about it now. Helen Magnus was plastered.

Will placed one hand around her waist and escorted her down the steps of the front door. He wasn't sure how much she'd had to drink or exactly what had gone on at her little party. All he knew was that he'd never seen Magnus this way before. He was glad she'd called when she did.

He eased her into the front seat, all the while listening to her complain that she was perfectly fine and could do it_ my shelf_. Yes, she had said _'my shelf_.' Will tried not to laugh.

"Okay, Magnus, I don't know what kind of dinner party that was, but we're taking you home."

"It was a perfectly fine dinner party. I had a wonderful time," she answered, beaming.

"I can see that," Will said, starting the car.

"And I won!" she exclaimed, grabbing Will's arm, startling him.

"Won what?" He'd heard burly man. Geoffrey? Congratulate her on some victory. He was curious what he'd meant.

"They said I could never hold as much alcohol as they. And I reminded them I had years of experience drinking men, and women," she said sticking a finger practically in Will's eye, "under the table. So I won!" she smirked, swaying a bit in her seat.

"I can see that. I'm sure you'll enjoy your victory quite a bit in the morning."

Magnus nodded. Then a quizzical look crossed her face.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked.

"Nothing," Will replied, doing his best to keep a straight face.

He started the car and pulled out, heading down the main drag of the district with its clubs and bars in full swing. They stopped at a stoplight. The heavy bass of the nightclub next to them vibrated inside the car. Magnus started tapping her foot to the music as they sat at the red light, then swaying her body with the beat. Finally, she grinned, looked at Will and proclaimed, "I want to dance!" and she opened the car door and hopped out.

The light turned green.

"Magnus!" Will yelled. But the light was green and cars were honking behind him.

"Damnit!" he swore to himself. He turned the corner and miraculously found a place to park. He locked the car and ran back to the nightclub to go find Magnus.

"Sorry, buddy," growled the bouncer outside the club shoving his hand into Will's chest. "Only women allowed in. We got plenty of guys for now."

"But my…" he started to say 'boss' but that wouldn't cut it. "My girlfriend is in there. She's drunk. I need to go get her."

"Yeah? When did she come in? What does she look like?"

"Tall, long dark wavy hair, skimpy black dress…oh! British accent!" Will answered.

The bouncer laughed. "Yeah, right, THAT's your girlfriend. Nice try, dude."

Will stepped back as the bouncer let a group of women in, all of them blonde, and all of them hot.

"Look, here's the deal," he said, stepping up into the face of the 6'5" gorilla standing guard outside the club. "She's my boss. She texted me to come pick her up. See?" He showed the text message to bouncer man, who laughed. "I need to get her home. Please, can you help me out?"

"Depends. Can you help me out?" the bouncer hinted smiling.

Will sighed, reached for his wallet, and pulled out a $20 bill.

Bouncer man shook his head. "I'm gonna need a little more help than that."

Will dove back in his wallet again and pulled out another $20. "Look, it's all I got" he showed, splaying the empty wallet open.

The gorilla man took it. "Fine. Go on in."

"Thanks," Will snapped, sarcastically.

The nightclub was pounding with techno dance music, flashing lights, and strobes. The smell of sweat, sex and alcohol were everywhere. Will was crushed in a sea of bodies moving to the beat. How he was going to find Magnus in this mass of humanity was…

_Oh. My. God._

There she was standing in the middle of one of three pedestals that hovered above the main dance floor but below the balcony. She was dancing…gyrating was more appropriate…with two Latino men. One was standing behind her, hands on her hips, Magnus' butt firmly against his crotch, her left arm up and around his neck pulling him forward, his face in her hair. The second guy danced in front of her, his chest and his crotch rotating against hers.

Will blinked. Gulped. And then wished for a cold shower.

_Holy shit._

They weren't really dancing. They were having sex with their clothes on. He couldn't tear his eyes away.

Suddenly, Mr. Trim, Dark, and Latino who was doing the dirty dancing behind Magnus said something in her ear and held up a little green tablet.

_Oh shit_! Will thought. _No! No! No! No!_ And ran toward the elevated platform, practically tossing people out of his way to get to Magnus in time. He was yelling at her, warning her, but the beat of the music drowned out his words.

He jumped up on the pedestal and tried to swipe the tablet of Ecstasy away before Magnus swallowed it, but it was too late. She leaned her head back onto the man's shoulder and let her face relax, allowing him to drop the tablet into her waiting mouth. She smiled at him, and yelled, "Will! Want to dance?" And she pushed her two dance partners roughly aside and grabbed Will by his jacket collar, pulling him toward her, wrapping her arms around his neck and grinding against his body in time with the music.

She was sweaty and hot and in the tightest, skimpiest outfit he'd ever seen her in in his life. The dress hugged her every curve, leaving nothing to the imagination. Her hair was flying wildly around her and she was dancing… moving…like he'd never seen her dance before. And now, on top of being drunk, she was about to be high. Euphorically so. Great. This night just kept getting better and better.

The worst part about it was… he was completely turned on.

He'd never, ever seen Magnus let go like this. She was a beautiful woman, incredibly hot, but this…uninhibited, undulating, smirking, skimpy black dress wearing, high heeled, drunk and soon to be high Magnus was…fucking sexy. There were just no other words for it.

She'd regret this in the morning. Maybe not even remember it, if they were lucky. So Will decided to do the only thing he could do.

He went with it.

He took off his jacket and tossed it to the floor, grabbed Magnus around the waist, pulled her against his hips, and started to work against her body to the tune of a new beat the DJ had just put on. Magnus moved her arms down Will's neck to his back and then his hips and his butt, moving in time with him to the music.

"_Cause I'll be Table Dancing  
This is your chance  
To be with me, and you will see  
Up on the table dancing  
That's where romance is  
If your with me  
And you will see"_

After a while she ran her hands up and down Will's body, suddenly laying wet, open mouthed kisses to his neck, sucking on his skin, the effects of the drug starting to kick in. "I love you, Will." She had to press herself completely against him, her lips caressing his ear and still half yelling so that he could hear her. "You are my most brilliant protégé yet!"

Will knew it was the drug talking. The effects were pretty standard: happy, loving, horny, the need to be touched. But still, hearing Magnus say that to him in her sexy British accent with her doe-eyed, glassy expression in the middle of a nightclub with his arms draped around her ass and her hands caressing him up and down his back was one of the hottest things he'd ever experienced. And god damnit it if he wasn't going to go with it just this once….

* * *

Magnus didn't wake until noon the next morning. Starving, thirsty, her mouth full of cotton, her head throbbing, and her muscles feeling oddly sore, she had only a vague recollection of the night before, and it wasn't good.

She stumbled into the kitchen, looking for food and water. Most of all, water.

"Good morning, sunshine," Will said, pouring himself a cup of coffee.

"Will," she said startled. "I…uh…."

"How's the party girl?" he smirked.

"You came and got me at Geoffrey's house, didn't you?"

He nodded. "I did."

"And you took me home."

Will hesitated. "More or less, yes."

She tilted her head at that. "More or less?"

"You don't remember?"

"Remember what?" she asked cautiously.

Should he? Nah. It was a one shot. He'd keep that special memory to himself.

"Nothing," he said. "I picked you up…took you home. Big Guy tucked you into bed."

Magnus nodded, relieved. "Thank you. I'm sorry, I…don't know what got into me."

Will smiled. "Hey, everybody needs to cut loose now and then."

Magnus avoided his eyes. "I suppose."

"Look, no worries, okay? I'll see you later today."

"Right. Thank you, Will."

Will walked out of the kitchen. Magnus strolled over to the iPod speaker, flipped it on to what was usually her classical musical playlist. She hoped it would help quiet her mind, ease her into the day, help her get over the embarrassment of imbibing too much the evening before. But instead of the soothing tones of a violin, grinding sounds of techno pop came blaring out of the Bose speakers.

"_Cause I'll be Table Dancing  
This is your chance  
To be with me, and you will see  
Up on the table dancing  
That's where romance is  
If your with me  
And you will see"_

All of the blood drained from Magnus' face. "Ah, bloody hell!"

In the hallway, Will Zimmerman laughed.

END


End file.
